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Lisa's Thoughts for September |
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I am sitting at the
edge of the dock, in a quaint, sleepy beach town, looking out across the
water as I have a million times before. I am pondering over what it is about
September that I love so much. I know for many, September will now be marked
as the month America bent to her knees, awakening our innocence. Although I
was rudely awakened on 9-11-2001 it did not dismantle my love for September.
I think September is my favorite month because it is my birth month. The
month my parents brought me into this world. Many birthdays have come and
gone, 46 to be exact. I look at my life thus far, in four weight-related
segments.
My first segment was from birth to the age of 13. From my memory bank I was very thin and active. I played baseball, climbed trees, swam and, loved to water ski and horseback ride. I did not display any outwardly concerns about weight. I was whimsical and carefree! Of course, if I seriously go back in my mind I already had a big passion and craving for sugar. I did love my sweets and absolutely had to have them when the craving would hit. I would beg, connive or steal. I remember sneaking into the sugar cubes and just letting them melt on my tongue and feeling such a tingle of joy. I also remember juggling many empty packs of coke bottles to what seemed like endless blocks, to the store. I stopped frequently in great pain because it hurt my hands and underarms trying to carry several packs at one time. Although my hands were blistering, I ignored it because I was on a great quest to cash in on the empty bottles for money to purchase something sugary to put in my mouth. I had such perseverance and endurance because I knew what was waiting for me at the end of my long road…chocolate! So although I was not struggling with the weight at this point I was already beginning to show some serious, "drug like" behavior towards sweets (Weight Loss By The Sea!). My second weight related segment fell on my 13th birthday, where I really made a significant turn in my young life. All of a sudden my body was doing things I could not understand. It was expanding! I began to get wider hips and a bust line that I was definitely not ready for mentally. Boys started really paying attention to me in a different way. I was no longer their sports buddy: I was "a girl"! I also started eating a lot. My hormones began to roar. I began to gain weight. This time was also a turning point because at 13 I started my first job at the local bakery! I felt like I won the magic ticket in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. When my boss was gone I began to create doughnuts for myself that were, in my opinion, master pieces! These personal delights were abnormally huge and bursting at the seams with filling and smothered with frosting. They were so magnificently bulging that one would almost need a forklift to carry them! I had no problem devouring several of these works of art throughout my workday. I began that job at 115 pounds and three years later topped the scales over 210 pounds! Thirteen was my first introduction to "diets". I continued on the diet track for almost 20 years gaining and losing weight a million times over. Each new diet chipped a little more off my self-esteem and squashed my metabolism until I became absolutely obsessed and compulsive with food and diet (Love Thy Self!). It was my 32nd birthday that my life took another tremendous turn. I was pregnant with my first son! It was as though the skies of heaven opened up and I could see very clearly. I began to eat properly and exercise because I had a life inside of me that I was responsible for. Although I was on the right track, my body had a mind of its own with hormones once again raging out of control. I gave birth to a beautiful boy who stole my heart, leaving me weighing 234 pounds! But slowly after his birth I began to shed the weight with proper foods and exercise. I went all the way down to my goal weight and remained there with healthy eating and exercise. The only issue I had was the periodic bursts of binges with sweets. I figured my weight was good and so I did not care if every few weeks I would eat an entire cake or bag of baked chips. I was only focused on weight being the issue. My fourth weight related segment fell on my 40th birthday. My beautiful weight control plan stopped working! I began to very slowly gain weight. No matter what I did I was getting heavier. Because the weight gain was so slow, I did not realize it was a problem until I hit 43 and I had to move up another size in my clothes.. This was not doable for me, especially since I was in the weight loss industry and helping thousands combat their weight problem. I wore my weight well and could actually hide this new twist of hormone issues. It was this 43rd birthday that I took a long look at what was happening to me. I began to connect a correlation between white flour and sugar with my out of control bouts with food (Power Thoughts!). I let go of the sugar and white flour and continued to exercise and slowly the weight was released and a wonderful calm came over me. My goal weight was restored and I felt gloriously free! Birthdays are a time of reflection for me. I have learned that I have control over my body. Sometimes we have to change the path of which we are working in order to create a new journey. As I am entering into my 46th year I honestly believe I am healthier than I have ever been. I have introduced weight lifting into my workouts and have seen remarkable sculpting and toning (Moving Through The Storm!). I look forward to another 46 years of adventure and body changes. I believe age is just a number and we can be as active, slim, and healthy as we want to be, if we continue to nurture and take care of ourselves. And if we are unfortunate to run into illness, it is my belief we will weather it better if we are coming from a baseline of health. As I sit here on the dock in hopes of catching a dolphin or two dancing gracefully across the water, the sun continues to go down, creating quite the shimmer across the water. I smile to myself and think: God is good.
Be sure to look for October thoughts on…
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Weight Control Therapy.com |
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